There are at least a dozen reasons why you would love Dürnstein, Austria. Vineyards and a ruined castle stand above it on the hillside; paddle boats stop here while taxiing tourists up and down the Danube River; the old town businesses and homes have well preserved rock facades; the streets are nearly traffic free; and narrow passages lead down to the river front; but the most important reason you would love Dürnstein is because it is where Richard The Lion Heart was held for ransom in 1192 by the local duke and the tourist bureau has a wry enough sense of humor to note that "Richard was among the first to enjoy the hospitality of the local people." Now, they might be sincere, but it's still amusing--as are the circumstances around Richard's capture and release--and you can reflect on this as you hike up the hill past all of the art students sketching the ruins.
See, Richard had escaped his mother's constant nagging to get married and have kids by joining a crusade (who among us can't relate?), but Eleanor of Aquitaine wasn't the type of mother to be easily put off. So, she chased after her son who must have been truly mortified in front of his crusading buddies when she caught up with him in Sicily.
Word has it that Eleanor was also concerned that Richard's minstrel buddy, Blondel, wasn't just a good friend and the future of the family line was at stake. Now, I'm not starting a rumor here. This one is over 800 years old. I'm just telling you what everyone else has been saying. I also don't want to suggest that this has anything to do with Sean Connery's sexual preferences. No one would expect a guy named "Richard the Lion Heart" to enjoy the company of men over women, and I'm sure the Robin Hood script made no mention of it.
Anyway, while running after her son, Eleanor found a suitable daughter-in-law in France and brought this woman to meet her son in Sicily where all three must have had a very interesting conversation.
Now, sometime during the crusade, Richard and the Dürnstein duke (not his official name) exchanged words. I imagine it started with, "Hey, Richard, I think I passed your mom on the way to Jerusalem the other day." I also imagine that Richard was smart enough to expect a comment like this, so he would have prepared a good come back. Whatever Richard said to the Dürnstein guy made him so angry that he went home with a grudge and everyone around him knew about it. This was unfortunate for Richard because he would later need safe passage through the Austrian Alps after shipwrecking off the coast of Croatia. (You can just hear him trudging up a mountain in the middle of winter saying, "Stupid, stupid, stupid" to himself.)
Although disguised as a peasant, Richard was uncovered, given to the duke, and held in Dürnstein Castle. Soon after, his minstrel buddy went looking for him, traveling from castle to castle playing their favorite tune. When the person in Dürnstein's Castle finished the tune from a window, Blondel knew he had found his king.
Out of war fatigue or a lack of Navy SEAL-types in 12th century England, Richard's mom opted to pay the ransom and Richard arrived home in time to save his crown.
Well, as I said, the castle is in ruins now, and it has nothing to do with Richard's stay. Apparently, the Swedes destroyed it in 1645--which is a lot later than one may have thought the descendents of Vikings were a threat.
Enns, and Krems:
On an episode of Frasier, Niles, Frasier, and their father go on a cruise where their father schools his sons on the art of the buffet line. He tells them not to take the breads and pastas from the beginning of the line because they're just filler. They should hold off until further down the line where they keep "the good stuff."
Now, I am no fan of pasta (sorry, Mom [she's Italian]), but I've filled-up on good bread, then regretted it when I didn't have room for the steamed shrimp at the end of a buffet line. You may be wondering what this has to do with Enns and Krems, so I'll tell you: Filler regret is not just for the buffet line. It's also for the time you spend in a lesser town when a better town was one town back or the one that awaits you down the line.
I hate to insult perfectly lovely people and towns, but Dürnstein is steamed shrimp while Enns, and Krems are just filler.
Now, to be fair, there are at least four outstanding aspects to pasta and bread on a cruise ship buffet line:
1) You're on vacation.
2) You can eat as much as you want.
3) You can eat whenever you want.
4) Breads and pastas generally taste pretty good.
In the same way, there are at least four good things about Enns and Krems:
1) Enns is reputed to be the oldest town in Austria which is both good if you're a tourist who needs to say publicly that you were in the oldest town in Austria, and hard to believe since there is a place in Hallstatt where you can walk on an old Roman sidewalk under a sporting goods shop. (They don't charge admission to see this....yet.)
2) Enns has a lovely old town built around a tower in the middle of a cobble stone square with outdoor cafes lining that square and narrow streets darting out in all directions.
3) Krems is also along the Danube and reachable by paddle boat steamer or a bike trail that connects the towns along the river.
4) Lodging in Enns and Krems is pretty reasonable (about 86 Euro for a guest house for two children, two adults, and breakfast [no charge for parking]).
Also, if you transported Enns or Krems to anywhere in the US, it would quickly become overrun by tourists between Easter festivities and Christmas Kinder Markets. But this is Austria, and a town needs to bring it's "A" game to stay on your list of places to see, otherwise you're missing steamed shrimp, the carving station, and the guy who will make you a crêpe any way you like it.
Below are pictures of Dürnstein Castle, Dürnstein, and one lonely picture of the tower in Enns.
Author of: Letters to Salthill
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